Our Mission

There’s more to life than striving to get accepted into the best kindergarten.

If you are one of the many oodles of people on the planet who can’t stand reading about economic theories, government policies, etcetera because those types of things are so boring, you’re not alone and you’re in the right place. There are issues that are critically important, but if no one can educate the people who have a low tolerance for boringness, then the critically important issues are likely to turn into disasters….

….unless the next American Idol season puts more emphasis on economic and environmental issues.

Unfortunately, if we start out by saying that our mission is to make the world a better place by educating people about the problems we face and suggesting specific things that can be done to improve people’s personal situation and the global situation all at the same time, a lot of people will respond by simultaneously groaning and clicking over to a web site that offers something more [funny, titillating, conservative-sounding, liberal-sounding, etcetera (take your pick)].

So let’s start out by saying that this site provides the most funny, titillating, conservative-sounding, liberal-sounding, etcetewa thoughts on the web.

And you’ll say, “Oh sure, that’s not possible,” and just as your index finger is moving into position to click over to one of those aforementioned sites, we scream, “Wait!!! Don’t go! We have some important information about the very survival of society as we know it.” Your index finger hesitates, but then continues moving into left-clicking position.

Hey!! We just got some breaking news about a celebrity being arrested for hijacking the Goodyear bwimp at gunpoint and forcing the bwimp pilot to fly him to a grocery store where he punched a man in the face while standing in the checkout line!

Sources close to the man with the punched-in face indicate that the celebrity became irate when the cashier would not accept the celebrity’s 2-party post-dated out-of-state check….
Now we’re pretty sure you’re paying attention, so before we give you the full story on this important breaking news, we just want to say….

Oh yeah, we want to say that all our lives we’ve been looking forward to the day when we’d be growed-up and doing growed-up things, like shopping online and eating sushi.

But the way things are looking right now, we’re not so sure we’ll ever get to do those things. We’ve become aware of some flaws in the way that the government works and the way that the economy works and basically the way that the whole world works. And the only reason we’re bringing it up now is that your children and grandchildren and great-grandchildren are the ones who will suffer the most by decisions that are made now and actions that are taken now. So, as babies ourselves, you can understand that we’re very sympathetic to the plight of our peers.

Our peers might be making more noise about this stuff if they weren’t so busy taking naps all the time.

We’re not saying that other stuff — letting people from other planets into the country, gum control, etc — isn’t important. Those things are very important too. It’s just that if future generations are spending every waking hour working just to pay off the interest on the debt that’s piling up now, and they’re doing it on a planet that has some serious resource shortages, they might not have warm, fuzzy thoughts about people who didn’t try to address the issues when they had a chance.
And remember, we’re the people you’re going to be depending on to drive you to the doctor to get fitted for that new prosthetic bladder.

Yeah, I don’t expect you’ll be jogging home after that little procedure.